some things are hard to replace

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“I’m looking for purple vincas,”
Dad says each Tuesday
when we make our rounds
from nursery to nursery,
this new bond we’ve formed
these past two months
since Mother’s death.

“Trucks come in each week,
keep checking back,”
they’d say at first, but now
before we make it through the gates
they just shake their heads, “not yet.”

So we get back in the car,
drive off to the next place
where I learn something new
about gardening with success
in Southeast Texas.

“Not many flowers
survive year round
around here,” he says.
“My purple vincas made it
through three winters,
but the last one killed them.”

“I’m sure we’ll find some, Dad.”
Then all is silent.


Poetic Inspiration~Claudia @ dVersePoets Meeting the Bar: Conversation/Dialogue in Poetry

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Filed under dVerse Poetry, laurie kolp poetry

32 responses to “some things are hard to replace

  1. some things can never be replaced… a very moving write laurie… pierced my heart a bit to feel his pain in this… i hope he gets his flowers and a bit of comfort with them…

    • So true… and thanks. I thought I had found some and tried to surprise him for his birthday last Saturday. I was so excited, called him and said for him to come out to the garage. There I was with a flat of the same color he has (they are so similar, these variations). We laughed and laughed. He loved them, though.

  2. K. A. Brace

    Laurie a very beautifully constructed poem >KB

  3. I am glad that your dad is keeping up the traditions that had been established before. I am sure this is meaningful for both of you. I am not familiar with purple vincas at all. You said they didn’t make it through last winter. I know it was a rough one in many ways.

  4. “,,, since mothers’s death … ” It was a hard winter. Vinca and laughter are good medicine. Beautifully understated poem.

  5. Oh to walk together in sorrow like this – some things become overwhelmingly important.. And winka is such a beautiful companion – our garden is full of the ordinary blue one..

  6. Glenn Buttkus

    There may be vinca in our garden; my brown thumb makes its confines off limits to me. What a touching, wonderful response to adding dialogue to poetics. Belated congrats on your publishing & book signing tour. Odd how we who run in the dVerse pack feel so close to each other, but beautiful too.

  7. Hope you and your dad find those flowers, and that your new bond with your dad blooms most gloriously!

  8. its hard….esp with those constant reminders of your own loss…and now the loss of flowers….floswer have such a way to brighten the mood as well….its cool though that this has created a bond for you…..

  9. Sharing these moments with us – I am honoured to read them. Walking through grief for a loved one is lime nothing else, and some things take on such significance. But creating new bonds is a joy, tinged though it might be with the loss. A lovely poem.

  10. This is a wonderful snippet of life poem which says more than the words printed here. Very nice work.

    Regarding the flowers…can you leave your name and number with a local florist and have them call you when the flowers arrive? If not, keep trying. I hope it doesn’t take much longer to find them.

  11. What a touching write Laurie ~ The title tells me it’s more than just searching for the flowers, hugs ~

  12. Beautiful… I do believe that you shall never forget them… my Grandmother grew them under her apple tree… your poem/pic brought back the memory, thank you for sharing!

  13. Nothing more comes when the silence sets in, Laurie. That was a type of convo Dad and I would have. The last word said the most! Will re-read soon. It triggered something. Inspiring. We’ll see!

  14. It’s so beautiful that you are there to share these days with your dad in support of his life..without your beloved mother..

    i have to say the saddest part of life of all..

    Might be my dad’s response to his third wife’s death..along with my step-sister ‘s death..about the same time…

    He just said..well… their planting her in the ground and that’s how it goes..

    He never said another thing about’s as if they never existed..

    at that point i had to wonder..

    if i ever did..and ever do still..
    at least in his closing in on 82….
    but yes he still loves his money…so much tendered to his heart…

    Sadness is glory…

    A cold heart is death….

    Sorry for going on..
    but a tear shared here and there..brings me life…more…and more…
    i’m so dam happy to be
    sad….at times….it’s a much better gift
    of life…

  15. I thought you conveyed the conversation so beautifully, that search that goes on and on for something so desired. Very well done Laurie.

  16. Flowers are a great source of happiness, we should always take care of them.

  17. i love how flowers tie two bereaved souls…a moving write Laurie

  18. your phrasing is both fluid and restrained, helping reinforce that somewhat awkward intimacy you’ve illumined ~

  19. yes because we are not taking much care about nature as we take care of gadgets

  20. CC Champagne

    Ahhhh… So sad, but still very nostalgic in a way. I think it is very easy to identify with much of this and even though my grandfather and I never went flower/plant shopping, he is the one I see in my mind’s eye when I read this. Absolutely beautiful, Laurie!

  21. I like all the things your poem tells us about the relationship with your dad, the way you learn new things about flowers and the painful reminder in your dad’s last words.

  22. A lot here beneath the surface – very moving poem.

  23. Your poem moved me almost to tears. How sad that a plant, so common in Europe that it grows wild by every path and hedgerow, can’t survive in Texas.

  24. Wonderful – great, quiet action here.

  25. Very nice Lori – can picture the nursery and repeated conversation and question until what was lost is found again….bkm

  26. hypercryptical

    How sad and heart-aching is the loss of someone we love so dearly Laurie – and how it is we look for evidence of their existence in nature.

    Both my mother and fathers ashes provided the bed of life for roses – and how I see them there.
    Much love and hugs.

  27. Oh, Laurie! this made me want to go find the flowers for him! Thinking of you and your family this weekend – and sending you hugs – K

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